Men's Health on Tony Horton

The current issue of Men's Health features an article about our favorite douchetastic Beachbody guru, Tony Horton -- just in time to promote his newly-published book.

Horton is heading to QVC—the network darling of little old ladies in quilted housedresses—to sell his P90X workout program. ("Just two easy payments of $64.95, plus $9.43 shipping and handling.") He'll do an hourlong taping at 1 a.m. (right after Joan Rivers sells jewelry), grab a few hours of sleep in a back room, and then do more tapings at 6 a.m., 6 p.m., and 10 p.m.

It's hustle like this that has enabled Horton to hawk a reported 3 million P90X DVD sets, in addition to his fitness accessories, nutritional supplements, and other workout programs. Not bad for a 52-year-old former stand-up comedian and theater major who lacks a college degree or, for that matter, any type of fitness credentials.

"Hey, George Bush became president. What was his experience?" asks Horton.

Hmm.

Link Dump

It's been a while since my last link dump, so this is going to be a big one. In no particular order:

Take your vitamin D.

And a cold shower.

Jesse Jackson Jr. made the list of The Hill’s 50 Most Beautiful People (on Capitol Hill) – not because of his involvement in the Rod Blagojevich scandal, but because he’s a “fitness nut” who converted a racquetball court in the Congressional gym into a “space dedicated martial arts, yoga, Pilates, and the P90X exercise program.”

“Toning” shoes = snake oil.

You can work out anywhere – and not having shoes is no excuse.

Here’s how to run an ultramarathon.

The China Study is bunk, so eat some meat.

I’ve successfully made my own beef jerky. Is pemmican next?

Mark Sisson’s about to unveil his Primal Blueprint Fitness program, which will center around Workouts of the Week (WOWs) posted every Monday on his site. From the description, WOWs sound a lot like CrossFit Workouts of the Day (WODs), which led one reader to ask Sisson to distinguish between the two. In the comments section of his blog post, Sisson responded:

There will be some similarities between WOWs and WODs, but some distinct differences, too. Most notably, we’re working on constructing WOWs that:

a) occasionally use specialized equipment, but with a focus on workouts where you can use ANY kind of weight (where a dumbbell, kettlebell, weight vest, heavy rock, etc. will do equally well)

b) occasionally use specialized equipment but with weightless (i.e. bodyweight) variations also provided

In other words, Sisson's WOWs are going to be very similar to WODs, but updated less frequently, and with less equipment to buy.

Lastly, it appears that I may be an addict. (And if you’re reading this, you’re probably one, too.)

Heavy Metal

How much arsenic, cadmium and lead is in your protein shake?

[A]n independent lab commissioned by Consumer Reports found that three servings of one kind of chocolate drink contains more lead and more cadmium than the daily allowances recommended by the U.S. Pharmacopia, the authority on these things. (Click here for full chart of products cited in the report.)

Andrew Shao, senior vice president of scientific and regulatory affairs at the Council for Responsible Nutrition, a supplement industry group, told Consumer Reports that protein powders and drinks are a safe option, even for teens and pregnant women — the ones frequently targeted for nutrition boosting.

But the extra protein may not outweigh the risks, said Michael Harbut, director of the Environmental Cancer Initiative at the Karmanos Cancer Institute in Royal Oak, Michigan. Cadmium can cause serious kidney damage, too much lead cause neurological problems, and we all know why arsenic is a mystery novelist's favorite poision, don't we?

But hey, everything is going to kill everybody eventually, right?

(Source: NPR)

Gary Null's Ultimate Power Meal Almost Kills Gary Null

Gary Null is an author, an outspoken promoter of alternative medicine, and a self-styled expert on health and nutrition. He also says he needs only two hours of sleep per night, and is an AIDS denier, claiming that HIV doesn't exist -- and that even if it does, it's harmless.

And that's not all: Null sells a line of supplements called "Gary Null's Ultimate Power Meal," a powder which -- after it's mixed with water -- is supposed to be ingested twice daily.

The problem? According to Null, after downing two "Ultimate Power Meals" a day for a month, it almost killed him. His body became overloaded with Vitamin D, causing kidney damage, extreme fatigue, and intense pain. He's now filed a $10 million suit against Triarco Industries, the company that manufactured the supplement, claiming that Triarco put a thousand times the amount of Vitamin D in each serving of "Ultimate Power Meals" than Null intended.

To treat his Vitamin D overdose, I wonder if Null went to a medical doctor or an alternative/homeopathic therapist.

(Source: The Consumerist)

Link Dump

Back at work and backlogged like crazy, so here are some links to keep you occupied until I dig my way out of email hell:

• It’s an election year, but who cares about the issues when you can dissect the diet plans of New York politicians?
• I’ve said it before: Lose your office chair and buy yourself a standing desk. (Or make one yourself.)
• Jorge Garcia (Hurley from “Lost”) is a fellow fan of Vibram FiveFingers (and also looks like he enjoyed Maui’s Surfing Goat Dairy farm as much as my pre-schooler did).
• Wondering whether your supplements are legit or just hokum? Check out this handy infographic.
• Slim Chips have zero calories. (But they’re made of paper.)
• Six words for Manhattanites (who are taking a mini-break from their diets, of course): Shake Shack Peanut Butter Bacon Burger.
• An interesting diversion: Guess which celebrity ran a faster marathon.
• Interested in a pill that fills you up so you don’t eat as much? Sounds a bit like the concept behind FullBar or edible versions of those dinosaur-shaped sponges that grow in water.
• Now that the FDA has announced that we’re eating too much salt (and that plans are afoot to place limits on the amount of salt in processed food products), MainStreet has provided a list of a dozen foods with excess sodium content.

That’s all I got. Back to the grind...

Fish Oil: Great for You! Unless It's Not.

Every morning, I pop a big ass fish oil capsule in my mouth. Fish oil offers tons of health benefits: It's a great source of two long-chain essential fatty acids, eicosapentaenoic acid (EPA) and docosahexaenoic acid (DHA)-- Omega-3 fatty acids that help lower triglycerides and boosts cardiovascular and cognitive health. EPA and DHA balance out Omega-6 fatty acids, keeping inflammation in check.

But boy, does fish oil make my burps taste foul. (Usually, my burps taste awesome!)

And now, according to a recently-filed lawsuit by the Mateel Environmental Justice Foundation, a bunch of over-the-counter fish oil supplements were found to contain toxic levels of polyclorinated biphenyls (PCBs), which may pose cancer risks and cause reproductive problems.

The PCB content varies widely: According to the Foundation, "[t]he lowest level, found in Solgar's Norwegian Cod Liver Oil, was 70 times below the highest, found in Now Foods Salmon Oil."

Toxicity can vary widely in fish oil, depending on what kind of fish is used and the contamination in its habitat waters, scientists say. Older, bigger fish tend to build up more PCBs in their fatty tissues than smaller fish, but habitat is still key. Deciphering which products are safest is not easy for consumers: Not all manufacturers state what kind of fish their oil is derived from, and few state which waters the fish come from.

FANtastic.

Link Dump

Happy surfing, y'all:

• Kevin Smith was kicked off a Southwest Airlines flight because the captain concluded that he was too damn fat and therefore posed a "safety risk." (This wouldn't have happened to Kelly Osbourne.)

• CNN's talking about barefoot running. Have we reached a tipping point yet?

• Two multi-million-dollar class action lawsuits have been filed against Jillian Michaels, the meaner of the two trainers from NBC's "The Biggest Loser," claiming that her endorsement of a less-than-effective weight loss supplement amounts to false advertising. The two named plaintiffs say that they bought Maximum Strength Calorie Control pills because Michaels endorsed the product, but later discovered to their dismay that popping the pills didn't make their fat magically disappear. (Duh.) Is it any wonder we Americans are perceived as dumb, lazy, celebrity-obsessed, overly-litigious, greedy fatties?

• Speaking of dumb: "Registered dietitian Jill Weisenberger once had a client who kept a puzzling food journal. The calorie counts were all out of whack. The woman's tuna sandwich had 33 calories. An apple: 144. Turns out the woman was mistaking a food-calorie book's index for a calorie chart." (Source: L.A. Times)

Link Dump

Time to unload another crapload of random links:

• Some folks dismiss what Barefoot Ken Bob and other barefoot running aficionados have to say about going shoeless -- in part because many of them look like slightly-crazed hippies. But now, scientists at Harvard have confirmed that barefoot running is likely to reduce the harsh impacts that often lead to injury. "[P]eople who run barefoot, or in minimal footwear, tend to avoid 'heel-striking,' and instead land on the ball of the foot or the middle of the foot." As a result, "these runners use the architecture of the foot and leg and some clever Newtonian physics to avoid hurtful and potentially damaging impacts, equivalent to two to three times body weight, that shod heel-strikers repeatedly experience."

• According to the New York Times, "a small but growing number of evangelical churches ... have embraced mixed martial arts -- a sport with a reputation for violence and blood that combines kickboxing, wrestling and other fighting styles -- to reach and convert young men, whose church attendance has been persistently low." Why are some evangelicals flocking to MMA? Because "Jesus was a fighter."

• Hardcore Burger King "superfans" are abandoning the fast food chain for healthier fare, thereby contributing to BK's two consecutive quarters of declining sales. I wonder if serving booze alongside Whoppers and fries will help lure back the "regulars."

• Speaking of food, is meat-eating incompatible with yoga?

• Take your Vitamin D. Or not.

• Lastly, what's up with the Kinesis Personal Fitness Home Gym? The sleek, austere design is certainly attractive, but if the exertion level displayed by the sweat-free, sweater-clad people in the video below is any indication, this looks like a ridiculous waste of money, time and space.

If You Don't Need to Poo, Your Weight Loss Drug Might Be Fake

Caveat emptor: The Consumerist reports that counterfeit versions of Alli -- an over-the-counter weight loss drug -- are being sold online.

Alli, a reduced-strength version of orlistat, a prescription drug used to treat obesity, works by "decreasing absorption of fat by the intestines, which reduces the number of calories you absorb." Orlistat, however, has a number of serious poo-related side effects, including:

• Urgent need to defecate
• Gas with an oily anal discharge (known colloqually as "sharting")
• Loose stools or diarrhea
• More frequent bowel movements
• Hard-to-control bowel movements

Meanwhile, the fake version of Alli contains another weight loss drug altogether: sibutramine, which helps to boost satiety. In other words, it's supposed to make you feel full. Unfortunately, sibutramine is a controlled substance that's been linked to cardiovascular problems, including high blood pressure. Additionally:

The FDA also warns that "sibutramine is a drug that should not be used in certain patient populations or without physician oversight. Sibutramine can also interact in a harmful way with other medications the consumer may be taking."

Explosive diarrhea is (marginally) more appealing than suffering a heart attack, but not surprisingly, the best choice may be to ditch Alli altogether. According to the Mayo Clinic:

Alli can help you lose weight, but the weight loss likely won't be great — perhaps just a few pounds more than you would lose with diet and exercise alone. Only a small number of studies have evaluated the effectiveness of Alli. And many of the weight-loss estimates are based on studies conducted on its prescription-strength counterpart, Xenical.

The average weight loss for prescription-strength Xenical is modest — about 6 pounds greater than diet and exercise alone after one year. So at half the strength, Alli could conceivably result in an average of 3 pounds lost in a year in addition to the approximately 8 pounds you could expect to lose from diet and exercise alone.

No contest: I'll gladly take three pounds over a full year of uncontrollable shitting.

Miscellany

I'm slammed today, so I'm just going to vomit up a bunch of links for you to peruse:

• Americans are still disgustingly obese, but at least we're not getting any bigger. (So suck it, Canada. You're getting fatter.)
• The New York Times published a piece on supplements, though I'm not sure I learned much from it -- nor, for that matter, have I been able to identify the author's point. Perhaps it's simply this: "[P]eople who eat a normal diet generally don’t need nutritional supplements, even if they exercise vigorously. But among the subset of people who already eat healthfully and want to bulk up in the gym, some supplements, when taken in sensible doses, can provide a lift." Shocker.
• Also in the "No shit, Sherlock" category: The Times reports that despite New York's requirement that restaurant chains post information about the calories contained in their offerings, people still ate like pigs during the holidays. (In any event, the posting requirement is ridiculous given that calorie counts aren't even accurate.)
• Someone thinks it's a good idea to design and market a Thighmaster that plugs into your videogame console.
• Lastly, if you're into CrossFit (or looking for more information about this particular fitness approach), you might want to check out "Every Second Counts" -- a documentary about the 2008 CrossFit Games. I was considering whether to try CrossFit, but this trailer scares the bejeezus out of me:

P90X: The Essentials

Did Santa bring you P90X last week? Or are you thinking of getting P90X to help achieve a fitness-related New Year's resolution? If you're a beginner searching for information about P90X beyond the marketing hype you've seen on late night TV, look no further. Below is a crapload of links to all kinds of essential -- and non-essential -- P90X stuff, organized (albeit haphazardly) for your browsing pleasure.

Should You Get P90X?

If you're considering whether to order P90X, you'll no doubt want to read some product reviews. Mine's here, but I've also listed a bunch of my favorite reviews on the sidebar to your right. Fitness Ninja's rundown is the most recent addition.

In my personal experience, P90X was just what I needed as a beginner to break through a plateau in my fitness level. I'm definitely satisfied with my results -- as measured by both what I can do and how different I now look.

Still, P90X isn't the end-all, be-all of home fitness programs, and it may not be for everyone -- especially if you're shopping for a weight-loss program, or if you're looking to quickly "get ripped" despite having excess body fat. As I wrote a few months back:

Can anyone who diligently follows the P90X plan actually get "totally ripped" in just three months? My conclusion: Probably not. While some P90X users will get "totally ripped," it appears that users who enter into the program with more than 15 or so excess pounds of body fat shouldn't expect to see the same "ripped" results after just three months.

Also, P90X is geared towards those whose primary fitness goal is improve their physical appearance. P90X incorporates plenty of compound movements and flirts with yoga and plyometrics, but first and foremost, it's a bodybuilding/weight loss program. If you're already happy with the way you look, and you're more focused on improving power and overall athletic/sports performance, you may want to try Insanity or CrossFit instead.

For a very thoughtful, well-researched and comprehensive critique of P90X, check out Begin to Dig's three-part review. It's worth reading even if you're already sold on P90X.

Is P90X Too Hard for Beginners?

Take the P90X Fit Test. If you can meet the baseline standards, and your doctor gives you a clean bill of health, you're good to go. Otherwise, try Power 90 or ChaLEAN Extreme first.

From Where Should You Buy P90X?

My recommendation is to order it via Amazon.com rather than directly from Beachbody's website for the reasons stated here. But if you're intent on purchasing from Beachbody, I suggest ordering through Pam "the Blam" Moore -- not only because she's one of my favorite onscreen P90X personalities, and not just because she generously allowed me to interview her at length, but because a portion of the sale proceeds will go to support GO Campaign, a non-profit run by Scott Fifer, another P90X trainer you'll get to know soon enough.

And don't buy a pirated copy. It makes Tony Horton sad.

What About Equipment and Supplements?

As I explained in this post, there are reasons (primarily financial) to stay away from Beachbody's equipment and supplements. Note also that Mark Sisson -- the guy who designed the P90X-branded supplements for Beachbody (and got Tony Horton interested in personal training) -- has since distanced himself from his own chemical concoctions, despite his continued appearances in Beachbody's marketing materials.

If you're wedded to cushioned shoes, get some good cross-training shoes. Otherwise, try some minimalist shoes or go barefoot during your P90X workouts. (Just don't drop a dumbbell on your toes.)

As for my own P90X equipment, I use a set of Bowflex SelectTech dumbbells, a rafter-mounted pull-up bar, and Manduka mats -- all purchased from Amazon.com. (You can read about other pull-up bar options here.)

I take a handful of supplements each day: 5 teaspoons of fish oil, a multivitamin, vitamin D (4000 I.U.s), creatine (5 g -- the same amount used in the P90X Recovery Drink), cal-mag citrate, L-glutamine, and quercetin with vitamin C. My recovery drink of choice used to be chocolate milk or a protein shake using this recipe, but since going paleo and experimenting with intermittent fasting, I generally don't have any recovery drink at all -- and  look, feel and perform great nonetheless.

What Should You Eat?

Following the P90X Nutrition Plan can be daunting. I was certainly put off by its strictness, and ended up crafting my own rules of eating during P90X. There's only five of them, so they're pretty easy to remember. Still, everyone's different, so I don't know if these rules'll prove successful for others. Whatever approach you take, remember this: Mind your portions, and try not to eat shit like this.
[UPDATE: This is how I now eat.]

How Can You Possibly Get Through 90 Days of P90X?

Stay safe, and prioritize your fitness. Schedule your daily workouts, and stick with them. Set your alarm clock for an hour-and-a-half earlier if necessary. Don't let anything get in the way of completing your workouts. Keep yourself accountable by letting family and/or friends know about what you're doing, and urge them to push you. I started this blog knowing that I'd feel guilty if I didn't post about my workouts every day, which meant I had to exercise on a daily basis so I'd have something to write about.

Frankly, I didn't get into this knowing that there'd be so much other P90X-related stuff to discuss, like Tony Horton's acting career, Dreya Weber's omnisexuality, Erik Stolhanske's film career, Maren's hardcore porn resume, Muscular Attorney Phil's lie-detecting capabilities, and Wesley Idol's super-shitty performance in Kenpo X. But learning random bits of trivia about the people behind P90X certainly gave me additional motivation to keep going.

And beware the saboteurs lurking among your friends and family. You'll know them by their proffers of pastries and fried food, or by their expressions of concern that you're working out too much. If you can, avoid/ignore them; if you're living with them, encourage them to join you.

Lastly, if you're having trouble finding time for lengthy workouts, you can shave off some time by skipping the cool-downs. (Some experts say that stretching's also unnecessary, but I enjoy it too much to abandon it altogether.)

Conclusion

I think I've rambled on long enough, so I'll just leave you with this: If you get P90X and you truly commit to getting through all 90 days, you'll see remarkable improvement, and you won't regret the experience. (But you will want to put Tony on mute for Round 2 of P90X. As my wife -- who cranked through an Insanity workout this evening -- put it: "It's no coincidence that Insanity doesn't have a 'silence' feature, but P90X does.")

Check It Out: The Primal Blueprint

Remember Mark Sisson, the guy responsible for all the P90X supplements? You know – this guy:

Sisson's not just a supplement designer. He's also the author of “The Primal Blueprint: Reprogram Your Genes for Effortless Weight Loss, Vibrant Health and Boundless Energy” and runs an informative health and nutrition website called “Mark’s Daily Apple.”

His book and blog focus primarily on the benefits of evolutionary fitness and nutrition – the concept that, from an evolutionary and biological standpoint, high-carb diets eaten around the world today are not suitable for optimal human nutrition. Rather, we should revert to a simpler, more “primal” approach to diet and exercise: Eat mostly animals and plants, lift heavy stuff and move around (frequently and slowly, with an occasional sprint) like our ancestors did. According to Sisson, low carb is the way to go; we’ve been poisoned by modern food – including not just processed snacks and fast food, but also grains, sugars and chemically-altered fats.

(For a more detailed review of “The Primal Blueprint” from another P90Xer, check out Jeff Pickett’s excellent fitness blog, Life Isn’t Over.)

I’ve come to really enjoy Sisson’s site, and I subscribe to a lot of what he's said about nutrition in “The Primal Blueprint.” (It’s also great that he’s a fellow barefoot running and Vibram FiveFingers enthusiast.) Especially in my first month of P90X, a super-low-carb diet was the catalyst for a significant change in my body composition. I’m a firm believer in eating whole, unprocessed foods whenever possible, and I’m perfectly happy eating salads (with some protein: meat, nuts, beans, etc.) for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

BUT (and this is a pretty big BUT):

The “Primal Eating Plan” is totally anti-grains, which poses a problem for me. As Sisson puts it in his “Definitive Guide to Grains”:

The bottom line is this: grains = carbs. Unnecessary at best, but flat out unhealthy at worst, they’re not the wholesome staples they’re made out to be. Talk about double taxation: Our bodies pay for what our trusty government subsidizes Big Agra for. The best – really the only way – to achieve a low carb, whole foods diet is to ditch the grains. (Your body will be better off without inflammation, the insulin roller coaster, not to mention the constant onslaught of creepy gluten and lectins.) A diet very low or entirely without grains (low-carb) has been shown to decrease risk for problems associated with diabetes, to lower blood pressure, alleviate heartburn symptoms, and shed abdominal fat. Finally, low carb diets have been associated with significant “reductions in a number of pro-inflammatory cytokines, chemokines, and adhesion molecules.”

One of the selling points of “The Primal Blueprint” is that it encourages you to simplify – to stop worrying about calorie counting or tightly-scripted exercise routines. But by effectively banning grains outright, Sisson actually makes it a lot harder to stick to the “Primal Eating Plan.” It hurts my head to think of the planning and forethought required to come up with a substitute for our pizza-loving kids, or the pain of having to scoop out the insides of a burrito to avoid eating a whole wheat tortilla.

I’m no expert, so I can’t speak to whether Sisson’s vehement arguments against grains are scientifically valid or not. But regardless, I don’t think that I can – or want to – eliminate grains altogether from my diet. It's just not realistic. I’ve already drastically limited my consumption of carbs over the past half-year; cutting added sugar almost entirely out of my diet and loading up on bananas and whole grains only after a hard morning workout. Grains help keep me from bonking when I push myself hard while working out. And besides, they fucking taste good.

[UPDATE: I eventually gave up grains. Really.]

One last note about Sisson, "The Primal Blueprint" and P90X:

“The Primal Blueprint” suggests that even those carbs that are ingested immediately after a workout should be avoided. But didn’t Mark Sisson create and help market the P90X Recovery Drink, which happens to be loaded with carbs?

Sisson’s response is a bit surprising – particularly because he now appears to be disavowing his own creation, and distancing himself from the claims he made in Beachbody's advertisements:

I did design the P90X post-workout shake. My main “business” is actually designing supplements, which I have done for several companies including my own. In the case of the P90X shake, I was contacted to design a product line to meet their particular demographic and price specs. At the time of design, the main challenge was to refill muscle glycogen immediately after a relatively longer and harder workout such that you could be ready to go again the very next day, so the main exercise premise deviated from PB [The Primal Blueprint]. Also, the diet being espoused by P90 staff dietitians was a higher carb diet, so I had to create something that would give the carb-burners a continuous source of muscle glycogen.

The prevailing technology at the time was to combine 80% carb and 20% protein, which I did using mainly fructose. I added antioxidants and creatine along with a few other recovery assists and made it the best tasting drink on the market. I appeared in their advertising at first as part of the deal, but I am no longer affiliated with the P90X program. Apparently, my interviews are still being used by P90 and there’s nothing I can do about that. Obviously, technology has changed in the years since that product was designed and I personally don’t follow a [post-workout] carb-loading strategy.

I'm no fan of Beachbody's P90X supplements, but that’s pretty different from what he was saying a few years ago:

Chocolate Milk is Good for You

Remember how I said that chocolate milk is the perfect post-workout recovery drink?

The New York Times recently reported about a new study showing even more health benefits derived from regular consumption of chocolate milk. The study found that "skim milk with flavonoid-rich cocoa may reduce inflammation, potentially slowing or preventing development of atherosclerosis."

“Since atherosclerosis is a low-grade inflammatory disease of the arteries, regular cocoa intake seems to prevent or reduce” it, said Dr. Ramón Estruch of the University of Barcelona, the paper’s senior author, adding that more studies were needed.

Also?

Participants also had significantly higher levels of good HDL cholesterol after completing the chocolate milk regimen, according to the study, which appears in the November issue of The American Journal of Clinical Nutrition and is already online.

Seriously, folks -- it's time to ditch Beachbody's overpriced P90X Recovery Drink in favor of cheap, tasty chocolate milk.

[UPDATED: On second thought...]

Beachbody: Helping You Lose Weight (From Your Wallet)

To achieve "optimal conditioning," the P90X Fitness Guide recommends purchasing a crapload of "official" P90X/Beachbody-branded equipment and supplements, including:

• The P90X Chin-Up Bar ($75);
• Tony Horton's PowerStands ($53);
• P90X Peak Health Formula ($50 for a 30-day supply);
• P90X Results and Recovery Formula ($51 for 25 servings);
• P90X Peak Performance Protein Bars ($29 for 12 bars)
• Beachbody's Strength & Muscle Men's Formula ($51 for 78 servings);
• Beachbody's Whey Protein Powder ($47 for 30 servings); and 
• Beachbody's Joint Support Super Formula ($38 for a 30-day supply).*

If you buy all of the above (and order enough of the supplements to last the entire 90 days), you'll end up shelling out almost A THOUSAND DOLLARS -- and that doesn't even include stuff you actually need, like the P90X DVDs themselves and a set of dumbbells or elastic resistance bands.  Beachbody and its nutrition guru, Mark Sisson (who resembles a grown-up version of one of the freaky-looking kids from "Village of the Damned") may have developed the best damned supplements known to man, but we're still in a recession, people. I can think of much better ways to drop a grand.

Still, if you're dead set on replicating the full P90X experience (without breaking the bank), here's what I recommend:

Pull-Up Bar

Forget about the P90X Chin-Up Bar, and get yourself a rafter-mounted pull-up bar ($50) or the Iron Gym Total Upper Body Workout Bar ($40) instead.  The rafter-mounted bar is fantastic if you're working out in your basement or garage; otherwise, buy the removable, door-mounted Iron Gym bar -- it's virtually identical to the P90X-branded version, but sells for almost half the price.

Push-Up Stands

Push-up stands aren't absolutely necessary unless you have serious wrist issues (in which case you probably shouldn't be doing P90X anyway), but if you want a basic set, you can get them for about $12.  The PowerStands are for wealthy Tony cultists only.  (But even Tony himself doesn't use PowerStands in the P90X videos; he uses regular, no-frills push-up stands.)

P90X Peak Health Formula

The P90X Peak Health Formula is basically just another daily multivitamin, but costs TEN TIMES AS MUCH per serving.  Try Costco's 100-pack box instead, which sells for $16.49.

The P90X Recovery Drink

As for the much-heralded P90X Results & Recovery Formula (a.k.a. the "P90X Recovery Drink"), you can just swap it out for a glass of chocolate milk.  Researchers have found that chocolate milk's a perfect post-workout recovery drink; as one article put it:

Believe it or not, 1% low-fat chocolate milk is one of the best recovery foods out there according to the results of a small, randomized trial reported in the February issue of the International Journal of Sport Nutrition and Exercise Metabolism. “Our study indicates that chocolate milk is a strong alternative to other commercial sports drinks in helping athletes recover from strenuous, energy-depleting exercise," coauthor Joel M. Stager, PhD, from Indiana University in Bloomington, said in a news release. "Chocolate milk contains an optimal carbohydrate to protein ratio, which is critical for helping refuel tired muscles after strenuous exercise and can enable athletes to exercise at a high intensity during subsequent workouts."

If you compare the P90X Recovery Drink's nutrition label with that of skim chocolate milk, the latter actually has fewer calories (170 versus 220), less fat (0 grams versus 2 grams), fewer carbs (29 grams versus 39 grams), and about the same amount of protein (11 grams versus 10 grams).  Although the P90X Recovery Drink adds a boost of Vitamins C and E, it's not really necessary if you're already downing a daily multivitamin. The Recovery Drink is also spiked with a bit of creatine, L-glutamine and L-argenine, but you can buy these supplements separately -- and a lot more cheaply -- at a health food or vitamin store like GNC.  And while I've seen reviews touting the tastiness of the Recovery Drink, chocolate milk is both delicious AND cheap.

P90X Protein Bars

Clif Builder's Bars offer virtually the same nutrition as the P90X Protein Bars (260 cal., 7g fat, 31g carbs, 20g protein).  And if you buy a box of 12 Clif Builder's Bars for $17 from Amazon rather than buying the P90X variety from Beachbody, you'll save $1 per bar.  The savings add up quickly over a period of 90 days.

Beachbody Strength & Muscle Men's Formula

The "Strength & Muscle Men's Formula" is just creatine and artificial flavoring mixed with some carbs (in the form of dextrose) to spike your body's insulin and drive the creatine to your muscles.  For a much cheaper alternative, pick up some pure creatine monohydrate powder (Vitamin Shoppe sells a 181-serving container for $20) and some grape juice.  Better yet, just mix a scoop of creatine powder into your post-workout chocolate milk.

Beachbody's Whey Protein

You can buy whey protein powder just about anywhere (Sam's Club, Safeway, Costco, Wal-Mart, etc.), and for a lot cheaper than $47 for a one-pound package.  GNC sells a pound of 100% whey protein powder for $16 -- ONE THIRD of Beachbody's price.  You can add whey protein powder to your chocolate milk, too.

Beachbody's Joint Support Super Formula

The main ingredients in Beachbody's Joint Support Super Formula are glucosamine and methylsulfonylmethane (MSM), which work together to form the building blocks of collagen.  Costco's version costs $17 for 180+ servings.  The same amount of Beachbody's product will set you back $228.

Frankly, none of the above items are essential for completing P90X (though taking a daily multivitamin's always a good idea, with or without P90X).  But if you're intent on going all-out, consider some alternatives before you take out a second mortgage to fund your Beachbody purchases.

*These prices include shipping & handling charges as listed on Beachbody's website.