Japanese Calorie-Burning Underwear

Face it: You know you want some.



[Source]

Stone Lock Training

Once upon a time in ancient China, a creative martial artist spied an enormous padlock made of stone and decided to use it as a training tool. With a built-in handle, these heavy locks could be used for lifting, swinging, throwing -- and they were cheap and available everywhere there was a set of big-ass doors that needed to be secured.

It didn't take long before the famous monks of the Shaolin Temple began using these shi shuo (石锁) ("stone locks") to hone their strength and skills, and since then, generations have trained with them.

The practice of using these padlocks as workout equipment eventually made its way to Okinawa, where the locks were called ishi-sashi ("awesome stone locks") and used as Karate training tools. Today, in Asia, you can still find practitioners honing their stone lock skills and showing off amazing feats of strength and coordination in competitions and demonstrations.

Shi shuo aren't nearly as popular or ubiquitous as kettlebells -- yet. But aside from the difference in shapes, they're very, very similar. From a real-world, practical standpoint, there's no difference between the two: Both are heavy weights with an integrated lateral grip that's elevated above the weight's center of gravity. I can't think of any kettlebell exercises that you can't also perform with a stone lock. And the majority of stone padlocks vary in weight from about ten to thirty-five kilograms, which is about the same for most kettlebells.



There is, however, one key element to stone lock training that you don’t see much of in kettlebell work (with few exceptions): THROWING.

One book on Shaolin training methods explains that you should “[t]ry to achieve the stone padlock to fly up and rotate round its axis in the air, making…two or three revolutions, then catch it.” Eventually, you’ll be “able to control the number of revolutions [and] increase or decrease their number (revolutions) by will.”

This stuff looks insane.

If you're in the market for something a little different, and you've always wanted to toss around a big heavy rock with a handle, you may want to buy yourself a set of stone locks. Who knows? With any luck, maybe you'll be the Pavel of shi shuo.

Learning English Through Exercise

Useful!







More about "Zuiikin' English" here.

Human Turd Burgers

Has it really come to this?



As I was watching this video, I kept thinking: This isn't Paleo. But heck, I guess if you're willing to eat fake meat MADE OUT OF HUMAN EXCREMENT HARVESTED FROM RAW SEWAGE, I guess the addition of red dye and soy protein is the least of your worries.

Plus, I have to give the brains behind this revolting initiative, Professor Mitsyuki Ikeda, style points for: (1) brandishing a super-creepy plastic hand pointer with red nail polish, and (2) going nuts with the office labeler. (Look closely: The guy's obviously fond of the words "SHIT BURGER.")

One last thing: Is it just me, or is that poo really weird-looking?

[Source]

Paleo Choices at McDonald's

An email from a reader:

“During the week, I have to pick up lunch at McDonald's. There is literally nowhere else I can go that is as quick and affordable. It's the only place within a 15 minute drive from my office where I can eat for under $5 and I only get 30 min. lunch breaks at work. My question is: What should I order if I want to eat Paleo? I usually have a Big Mac but with no sauce and I remove the buns. Thanks.”

Answer: Water. And possibly the coffee, assuming you take it black and with no sweeteners. Maybe the salads, if you get it without the dressing, “cheese,” and fried pieces of “chicken.”

But COME ON. Are you really asking me this question? Did you really think I'd answer by saying something like: "Get the McNuggets, but scrape off all the breading with your fingernails"? I recognize McDonald’s is dirt-cheap and ubiquitous, but so is bird shit.

Look -- I’m not saying that you can’t live on fast food. With Fat Head, Tom Naughton punched Mayor McCheese-sized holes in Morgan Spurlock’s Super Size Me, showing that you’re unlikely to vomit and die from eating at McDonald’s. You can probably eat low-carb and stave off obesity (but not systemic inflammation) for a good long while by avoiding the sugary beverages and refined carbs at fast food joints. If you live in Asia, you can get gluten-free buns at McDonald’s -- they’re made of rice. And even if you’re stuck with regular old Mickey D’s buns, you can devour 25,000 Big Macs over the course of 39 years and live to tell the tale.

But why go to the trouble of driving to McDonald’s when you can eat real food? Believe it or not, YOU CAN PACK YOUR OWN LUNCH FOR UNDER FIVE DOLLARS. True story!

Buy some eggs, unprocessed deli meat, avocados, salad greens and tomatoes. Hard-boil the eggs. Throw together a bunch of big-ass salads with everything you bought. Bring your salads to work. Don’t forget to pack a fork. You’ll save: (1) time, (2) gas money, (3) me from having to answer questions like “What Paleo foods can I order at McDonald’s?”

Because seriously, if you’re going to break down and make a trip to McDonald’s, don't go all half-assed. Get their tasty, tasty fries. And if you’re in Japan, order a Double Mega Tomago Burger. ‘Cause you only live once.

Underage Japanese Lucha Libre

I can't decide what's more mindblowingly awesome:

1. the fact that Japanese pro wrestling exists, or
2. the fact that one of its stars is nine years old.

By the way, what's the deal with all these scary child wrestlers?

[Source]

Link Dump

Time for some random Internet goodness:

• Do not drink an entire bottle of soy sauce. (And not just because soy is terrible for you.)

• The Art of Manliness presents “The Napping Habits of 8 Famous Men.” (In many cases, though, it appears that they “napped” ‘cause they were on the verge of collapse from not getting enough sleep. Sometimes, lack of sleep is unavoidable -- but remember: Sleeplessness is not a sign of virility.)

• American kids think that cartoon mascots make breakfast cereals taste better. In other news, our kids are dumb.

• Speaking of cereal, check out this nostalgia nausea-inducing list of breakfast cereals of the 80s and 90s that will (hopefully) never grace your kitchen table again.

• Snooki wrestled on WWE Raw last night. I know you care.

• Men’s Fitness UK profiles Gym Jones and its new Fundamentals seminar. (Background: Gym Jones’ founder, Mark Twight, was affiliated with CrossFit early on, but moved on to develop an approach that emphasized individualized, sports-specific training. After Gym Jones received widespread attention for training the actors in “300,” CrossFit founder Greg Glassman got upset and claimed that Twight “stole” the CrossFit training program. CrossFit HQ even sent a mole to a Gym Jones seminar. Classy!)

• Gym Jones is also training the next Superman. I’m sure Glassman is steaming.

• The Dutch want you to eat bugs. “Dongen is head of the meat department at Sligro, a kind of Costco on the edge of this trim Dutch town. Besides steaks, poultry and others kinds of meat, he offers mealworms, buffalo worms, locusts and other insects, as well as prepared products containing insects like Bugs Sticks and Bugs Nuggets — not for pets, but as a source of protein for people.”

Finally, let’s just admit that all of this is trivial fluff in light of the unfolding events in Japan. When you have a moment, please donate to the relief efforts if you can. (Click here and here for more information on how you can help.)

Treadmill + Pool = Awesome

Someone finally put a treadmill to good use.



(Source: Kottke)

No Muss, No Fuss

Japanese inventiveness knows no limits -- not even when it comes to condiment packaging.



(Source: tofuprod.com)

Omakase

Japanese food isn't all rice and noodles (and Pocky), which is a good thing, considering our ongoing efforts to avoid simple carbs.

Last night, we ate at a local Japanese place, and ordered omakase, leaving the choice of dishes up to the chef. Although we hadn't expected it, it turned out that the kitchen's selections were -- for the most part -- right in line with our Paleo/Primal approach to eating.

Yes, there was rice in our sushi and sugar in our dessert, but our two carbivore children gobbled 'em up.

McDonald's Cheese Katsu Burger

I honestly haven't eaten a single bite of McDonald's food since 2001. After reading Eric Schlosser's "Fast Food Nation," I swore off the Golden Arches for good.

Still, McDonald's Cheese Katsu Burger is strangely alluring. After all, I love cheese. And katsu. And burgers.

Thank God it's available only in Japan.

(Source: This Is Why You're Fat)

I Can't Stand the Sight of You

I can't figure out if this is supposed to be a workout video or an English instruction video. Either way, I question its effectiveness.

Body Dysmorphia: Japan Edition

While the rest of the world gets fatter, Japanese women (but not men) are getting skinnier -- starving themselves and taking up smoking. As reported in the Washington Post:

The trend is most pronounced among women in their 20s. A quarter-century ago, they were twice as likely to be thin as overweight; now they are four times more likely to be thin. For U.S. women of all ages, obesity rates have about doubled since 1980, rising from 17 percent to 35 percent.

Social pressure -- women looking critically at other women -- is the most important reason female skinniness is ascendant in Japan, according to Hisako Watanabe, a child psychiatrist and assistant professor of pediatrics at the Keio University School of Medicine in Tokyo.

"Japanese women are outstandingly tense and critical of each other," said Watanabe, who has been treating women with eating disorders for 34 years. "There is a pervasive habit among women to monitor each other with a serious sharp eye to see what kind of slimness they have."

Public health experts say that younger Japanese women, as a group, have probably become too skinny for their own good. Restricted calorie consumption is slowing down their metabolisms, the average birth weight of their babies is declining, and their risk of death in case of serious illness is rising.

Sounds like someone could use an extra scoop of fried chicken wing flavored ice cream.

Usain Bolt: The Japanese Reenactment

We Asians have a wide range of interests, including doing AP Calculus homework, illegally drag-racing souped-up Honda Civics, and collecting insanely pornographic manga. Now, we can add another to the list: Unnecessarily reenacting the exploits of internationally-known sports figures.

First, there was the Chinese computer-generated video of Tiger Woods' automobile mishap, and now, we have the Japanese reenactment of Usain Bolt beating a bowlegged white guy in a race. (But why does the loser get a medal? And what's up with Japan's love of blackface?)