Ace Power!

Ace Power is South Korea's answer to the Shake Weight:



[Source: BuzzFeed]

This Car Jumps Rope Better Than I Can

But let's see it do double-unders.

My New Favorite Internet Cooking Show

Skateboarding on Dogs

Love skateboarding videos? Love dogs? How about a video of people skateboarding on dogs?



Calm down. It's just special effects. Sheesh.

[Source]

Confused

Watching this video reminds of how long it's been since I received a massage from a lady robot whose hands are made of lobsters.

(Source: CC Pearce)

Be The Official Face of Shake Weight!

I don't know why the makers of this dumbbell-slash-sex-toy are holding a contest to find the next "official face" of Shake Weight. It's clearly this guy:



But if you're looking to become the laughingstock of the fitness community win $30,000, go ahead and apply here.

(Source: Outside)

Shake Weight at the Gym

'Nuff said.

Amazing

Each and every one of 'em. Especially the bowling one.

Hurdles? What Hurdles?

DIY Sledding/Bungee Jumping Off a Rooftop

Because sometimes there's nothing good on T.V.

Kicking Ass, Bart Conner Style

Whew! It's a good thing that pre-modern villages in imaginary Third World countries have gymnastic pommel horses conveniently located in the middle of town squares.



I can't put in words how much I envy those who have mastered the ancient martial art of gymkata.

Dry Yourself With Hairy Balls

Probably NSFW, unless images of (fake) hairy balls are commonplace in your workplace:



This reminds me of how gross gym towels (and gyms in general) can be. I still shudder at the memory of using the nasty rags at the local globo gym. Tip of the day: BYO towels, gym rats.

Put That Cookie Down

It's a health hazard.

Shake Weight Shakespeare

Because sometimes, you just feel like reciting a soliloquy while handling a Shake Weight.



(Source: Urlesque)

Someone Get Me a Meat Bicycle and a Broadsword

The Conan Sandwich

I counted exactly zero paleo-friendly ingredients.

How to Make a Roll of Quarters Smell Like Belly Button Cheese

One of the few drawbacks to avoiding obesity: You can't dispense $7.50 in coins from your belly button.



(Source: URDB)

Salami Fighting Association

By far the most disturbing thing I've seen in days:



Personally, I prefer Lady Gaga's meat bikini over these guys' bacon skirts.

Paula Deen Gives Me Nightmares

(But really, I only object to the doughnuts.)

Gary Busey: Fantasy Lawyer

Last month, a federal district court judge ruled that the Center for Science in the Public Interest could continue its lawsuit against Coca-Cola for misleading consumers about Vitaminwater's (lack of) health benefits. The judge pointed out that Vitaminwater is basically just a sugary, non-carbonated soft drink fortified with a few vitamins for marketing purposes.

In a strongly worded 55-page opinion, Judge John Gleeson of the U.S. District Court in Brooklyn said the health claims on some Vitaminwater bottles may be in violation of FDA regulations since the drink "achieves its nutritional content solely through fortification that violates FDA policy." The judge thinks Coke could be violating the so-called jellybean rule, which says that a food- or drinkmaker cannot load otherwise unhealthy products with vitamins or other nutrients in order to claim it is healthy. A sugar product is a sugar product: you can't say a jellybean fights heart disease because it contains no cholesterol.

It's a little weird (but kind of awesome), then, to see that Vitaminwater's new pitchman is a bug-eyed Gary Busey -- not exactly the model of health -- who practices "fantasy law" by physically assaulting people.