Last Friday Feels Like a Million Years Ago

Honestly? I can't remember how long it took me to finish last Friday's workout. Guess I should blog more frequently, huh?

I do recall, however, repeatedly attempting bar muscle-ups prior to our metcon, and failing over and over again.

I've done ring muscle-ups, but bar muscle-ups are terra incognita for me. I almost managed to crank out one -- on my last try, I got my upper body over the bar, and my left arm was in position to push up, but my wonky right shoulder gave out and I flopped back down. Argh.

I'm so close to getting a bar muscle-up that I can almost smell 'em. Sadly, my right wrist has been sore and swollen since the weekend, which means I've gotta take it easy for a little while. But I've got my eye on you, bar muscle-up.

Charley Horse 4, PR 0

We had another packed house in the 5 a.m. class at CrossFit Palo Alto today, where we were treated to a variety of gymnastics movements (we practiced tumbling, handstands, ring L-sits, skin-the-cats, etc.) before Tim scrawled on the whiteboard:

• Loooooove 2K row

To paraphrase Tina Turner: "What's LOVE got to do with it?"

After all, I both fear and loathe the erg. There are few workouts I hate as much as this one. Rowing 2000 meters invariably leaves me feeling totally wrecked -- and today was no different. Plus, my track record seems to indicate that I'm getting worse and worse at this towing stuff.

My previous 2K row times? 7:45 (July 2010), 8:04 (October 2010), and 8:07 (July 2011). Suffice it to say, I'm not exactly blazing fast on an erg. In fact, I seem to be getting slower rather than faster -- despite throwing myself fully into the rowing each time.

So it came as a but of a surprise when, for the first three-quarters of today's workout, I was actually feeling decent. The first 500 meters flew by without incident, and the second 500 was bearable. The third 500 was a kick in the pants, but I still had some fuel in the tank. "Just keep that split under 2 minutes," I heard Tim yell from behind me.

But as I entered the home stretch, my feet painfully seized up in cramps. Both arches were on fire. And immediately thereafter, I developed charley horses in both thighs, too. Ah, muscle spasms. Racked with spasming body parts, I forgot all about proper erg technique. My pulls slowed, and my head bobbed back and forth. It was ugly, folks. REALLY ugly.

As soon as I was done, I collapsed on the floor, whipped off my shoes, and tried to stretch and massage out my lactic-acid engorged appendages. I must have stayed on the floor for a good 5 minutes before staggering to my feet.

On the plus side:

• I learned that it takes me approximately 260 strokes to row 2K.

• I got my second-best 2K row time today. I rowed 7:54 today -- 9 seconds off my P.R., but 13 seconds better than my P.W. (Personal Worst).

• I didn't get sick afterwards. (Knock on wood!)

• This probably means we won't have to row 2K again for at least a little while.

I have no idea if what I just wrote makes any sense. Pretty sure I passed out a few times while typing this post tonight. Must...sleep...now...

Friday's Workout

Good news: The groin's feeling better! Granted, it's still not in tip-top shape -- I still have twinges of pain discomfort when I push myself too hard -- but I'm definitely on the mend.

How do I know? After practicing L-sits, pass-throughs and skin-the-cats, I was able to join the rest of the 5 a.m. class in cranking out a benchmark WOD created by CrossFit Central called "CC Flyers" -- and I didn't require a wheelchair to leave the premises thereafter.

CC Flyers consists of 3 rounds of:

• 400-meter run
• 12 overhead squats (95lbs / 65 lbs)
• 21 box jumps (20")

I successfully fought off the urge to stupidly load up the barbell with more weight than my groin could handle, and went with the women's RXed weight instead. Sixty-five pounds was just enough to challenge me without (further) wrecking my adductors.

Snatching the weight wasn't a problem, and for the most part, the overhead squats didn't feel too bad, either. I felt myself holding back, though, especially during the run and the box jumps. Paranoid that I'd pull my groin again, I tried to keep myself from doing more than my bum leg would allow. (Not I would have performed much better if I'd gone balls-to-the-wall, though -- I'm not exactly what you'd call a fast runner.)

Result: 12:30.

Friday's Workout

This morning, while doing our usual warm-up duck walks, a shooting pain raced up my right groin muscle. I paused before resuming my waddling, but my leg did not feel awesome -- especially when I got up again and tried to squat. I could do it, but it felt incredibly un-good.

Still, I've been a wreck all week, so what's a little crotch pain? Besides, the strain happened during DUCK WALKS, for cryin' out loud. How bad could it possibly be?

As we practiced gymnastic skills (L-sits, pass-throughs, skin-the-cats), I tried to shake it out. I stretched and massaged my inner thigh, but it only made me wince. (I'm sure it was super sexy, though.) After a few minutes attempting to will my groin back into shape, I robot-walked over to Tim and quietly told him that I may have hurt myself doing duck walks. (DUCK WALKS!)

Seeing the concern on his face, I countered: "But I can totally do this gymnastic stuff! And it's not like I can't put weight on my leg. It's just...a little uncomfortable. As long as our metcon doesn't involve doing a hundred air squats..."

"We're not doing air squats today, but..." Tim's voice trailed off. "Just take it easy," he said, cautioning me to play it safe. "Be smart."

Unfortunately:

• Tim then wrote "Fran" on the whiteboard;
• I heart Fran, and was desperate not to miss her today; and
• I am not smart.

Tim and the Terminator both raised their eyebrows as I loaded the RXed weight on my barbell. "You sure?" they asked. Yes, I thought. My groin wasn't feeling 100 percent, but I was dead certain it wasn't serious. I'll just rest this weekend, I told myself. I can work through discomfort. Fran doesn't take long.

So I did it. Not long after I started, my mind shut out the fire in my groin. And I got through the first 21 thrusters unbroken (though my subsequent sets -- of both thrusters and pull-ups -- were interrupted by frequent breaks).

But now, looking back, I'm not sure it was worth it. My time was 6:56 as RXed -- 24 seconds worse than my previous Fran time. I'm left wondering how I would have performed if I'd waited until I was less thrashed, and whether I'd be more comfortable right now if I hadn't insisted on pushing myself so hard.

Lesson: I need to be less of a stubborn jackass when it comes to this CrossFit stuff.

Friday's Workout

What was different about this morning's class at CrossFit Palo Alto?

• Tim wasn't there. For the first time ever, he didn't coach the 5 a.m. crew. (He's in Colorado with Kristen to help pace The 6 Soles as they run the Leadville 100.)

• Trish (M's coach) was our fearless leader today, and shook us out of our routine by having us perform unfamiliar movements (during our warm-up and cool-down). Like Tim, she's all kinds of awesome, but in a totally different way.

• We set an attendance record! Fourteen bodies were in the gym this morning before the crack of dawn to get our WOD on. If just one more person had shown up, we'd have been at capacity for the first time ever. (Yes, Blake, I'm talking about you.)

Strength Skill:

• L-Sits / Pass-Throughs / Skin-the-Cat

Gymnastics are fun. I wish I were better at 'em, though -- in particular, my L-Sits could use some work. I used to have a pair of parallettes at home, but my mother-in-law crushed one of them with the garage door. Time for a trip to the Home Depot, I guess.

Metcon:

7 rounds for time:

• 7 dumbbell push-presses (45lbs / 30lbs)
• 7 pull-ups

I flirted briefly with the idea of going RXed, but by the time I went to grab the sole pair of 45-pound dumbbells, the Terminator had scooped them up. Trish pointed out that I could do the WOD with a pair of 20kg kettlebells, but after trying 'em out, I ended up chickening out. By the time I put the kettlebells back, only the 30-pound dumbbells were left. (Lucky me!)

Result: 4:57.

69 Years Young

Who says you have to get old?

[Source]

Friday's Workout

Is it just me, or do we tend to do tougher metcons on days we mess around with gymnastics stuff?

Strength Skills:

• L-Sits
• Pass-Throughs
• Skin-the-Cats

I need to work on my L-Sits. A few months ago, I was able to hold an L-Sit for 30+ seconds without too much effort -- but today, my arms began trembling just ten seconds in.

Good thing I have a pair of parallettes at home, though the kids are constantly perched on 'em. M want to use them to practice her L-Sits, too. Looks like I may have to go pick up some more PVC pipe.

Metcon:

A barbell complex is a fine way to kick off the weekend.

7 rounds for time:

• 3 power cleans
• 5 front squats
• 7 deadlifts

When Tim first wrote this workout on the board, I was annoyed. I knew I couldn't do this one using the RXed weight of 165 pounds. The rate-limiting move, I figured, was the power cleans. On my best day, I might be able to power-clean 25 pounds in excess of my bodyweight for one or two reps (if that), but certainly not 21 times. I was stuck with a 115 pound barbell.

"But that's too light a weight for the front squats and deadlifts," I whined to Tim.

Smiling, he replied: "I'll remember you said that."

At the time, I didn't register what he was trying to tell me -- namely, that I was insane to think that the weight would feel at all "light" once the clock started. And of course, he was right: Even as I began my first round of front squats, I was regretting my choice of weights. Throughout this WOD, the only thing that kept me from setting down the bar during the front squats was the knowledge that I'd have to clean the damned thing back up again.

Result: 9:22.

Friday's Workout

Ten people in class this morning -- a 1000% increase in just eight months!

All of us took turns messing around with skin-the-cats on the Olympic rings and L-sits and pass-throughs on the parallettes, and then it was time to say Grace. Literally.



Metcon:

• "Grace" - 30 clean & jerks for time.

The RX'ed weight for men is 135 pounds, but the last time I did this, I opted for the ladies' RX'ed weight of 95. Today, after some goading and peer pressure, I decided to go heavier -- by a whopping 10 pounds.

Yep, I'm a wimp. I finished Grace in 4:06 today -- more than a half-minute faster than the last go-round -- so in hindsight, I could (and should) have gone with at least 115 pounds.

Nonetheless, even with just 105 pounds on the bar, Grace is no walk in the park. After the first half-dozen cleans and jerks, I was no longer able to string 'em together, and resorted to dumping the weight from overhead rather than controlling the bar all the way down. (I'm sure the good folks at Planet Fitness would not be happy with me.) Grace may look simple on paper, but it's brutal.

On the plus side: Grace is also really, really fun. There's something incredibly primal and satisfying about picking something heavy off the ground, thrusting it over your head, and sending it crashing back down -- over and over again. (HULK SMASH!!!)

Besides, unlike a lot of other CrossFit WODs, it's over so quickly that you don't even have time to break a sweat.

Friday's Workout

Even now, my right ass cheek is sore from Wednesday's pistols.

Thankfully, this morning's gymnastics practice at CrossFit Palo Alto didn't require much in the way of butt action. Instead, we played around with skin-the-cats, L-sits, and pass-throughs -- you know: Stuff that my six-year-old likes to do in our garage when he's bored.

But after goofing off on the rings and parallettes for a while, we got down to business.

Metcon:

4 rounds of 3 minutes each (with a one-minute rest in between rounds):

• Round 1: Run 400 meters, then as many 95-pound barbell thrusters as possible;
• Round 2: Run 400 meters, then as many pull-ups as possible;
• Round 3: Run 400 meters, then as many 95-pound sumo deadlift high pulls as possible;
• Round 4: Run 400 meters, then as many burpees as possible.

This was surprisingly fun (and not-so-surprisingly exhausting).

Despite my attempts to apply all the stuff I learned at last month's CrossFit Endurance running seminar, I'm not exactly quick on my feet. (I mean that literally, not figuratively.) So after finishing each quarter-mile run in each round, I didn't have much time left on the clock to crank out as many reps as I would've liked. But on the plus side, I knew I could dive headlong into the max-rep sets knowing I wouldn't have to keep up the pace for very long.

Result:

• Round 1: 17 thrusters
• Round 2: 26 pull-ups
• Round 3: 15 sumo deadlift high pulls
• Round 4: 16 burpees

Total: 74 as RXed.

It's always good to start the weekend flat on my back. And clearly, I wasn't the only one who ended up horizontal after the workout:

(In fact, M did this workout, too, as part of her first-ever CrossFit class.)

Friday's Workout

Strength Skills:

Just like last Friday, we worked on a bunch of gymnastics moves, including:

• L-Sits
• Parallette Push-Up/Pass-Throughs
• Skin-the-Cats
• Back Levers

It's fun being upside-down.

Metcon:

3 rounds for time:

• 400 meter run
• 12 burpees
• 21 overhead kettlebell swings (using a 53-pound kettlebell)

Result: 11:23. Nothing too bad. The last few reps of my final round of kettlebell swings were a bit precarious, but I managed to avoid dropping a big ass metal ball on my skull. I'm not dead or hospitalized, so I consider this workout a smashing success.

Friday's Workout

Strength Skill:

We began with a bunch of gymnastics stuff today, including:

• L-Sits
• Parallette Push-Up/Pass-Throughs
• Skin-the-Cats
• Back Levers
• Muscle-Ups

This is the first time I attempted back levers. I'm sure I looked ridiculous, but they're incredibly fun.

I hadn't practiced muscle-ups in earnest since I first managed to do one back in July, but learned that I still have it in me to crank 'em out. Progress!

Metcon:

"Eva" (sort of):

3 rounds for time:

• 600 meter run
• 20 overhead kettlebell swings
• 20 pull-ups

Result: 15:58. An unscaled Eva -- which requires five rounds of 800 meter runs, 30 kettlebell swings and 30 pull-ups -- would have crushed us. Even with all the modifications, it felt like this workout took forever.

Friday's Workout

Strength Skill:

Two (relatively) easy ones today:

• L-Sits

I made a set of homemade parallettes out of PVC pipe a few months ago, but haven't used them since finishing my Level One testing. It's a shame, because L-sits are such a great, simple exercise.

• Skin-the-Cat

My kids (ages 2 and 5) love practicing skin-the-cats at home on our gymnastic rings -- so much so that they'll sneak into our garage to do 'em when we're not watching. I can now see why they get such a kick out of flipping and suspending themselves upside down. Plus, skin-the-cats are great for mobilizing and stretching the shoulders. Looks like I'm going to be joining the kiddies the next time they decide to hit the rings.

Metcon:

"Diane" - for time:

• 21 deadlifts (using a 225-pound loaded barbell, which is about 1.6X my bodyweight)
• 21 handstand push-ups
• 15 deadlifts
• 15 handstand push-ups
• 9 deadlifts
• 9 handstand push-ups

Result: Holy hell. I'm still checking to see if my arms are attached to my torso.

In a rash display of bravado, I announced that I was going to do this workout "as Rx'ed" -- in other words, as prescribed by the CrossFit powers-that-be who sit in smoke-filled rooms concocting crimes against humanity and then giving them innocuous names like "Diane."

This would be my first encounter with Diane, and doing this workout RX'ed meant pulling 225 pounds 45 times -- a first for me. And although I can easily crank out sets of 5 unassisted HSPUs, I'd never before attempted 45 reps. After thinking this over, part of me considered backpedaling so I could scale down the HSPUs by using a band harness or plyo box.

But my ego got in the way. I decided to stick with the RX'ed workout. The fact that I was the only one in the 5 a.m. class dumb enough to attempt this should have set off some red flags for me. Unfortunately, I'm not the brightest bulb.

Some people blaze through Diane in less than 5 minutes:



Some can even do it in under 2.5 minutes:



Me? 13:59. I don't know if I'm red in the face from embarrassment or from the blood pooling in my skull from all the handstand push-ups.