Spotted at Trader Joe's

Ron Swanson works at Trader Joe's?

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I Wish This Was Real.

But Humphry Slocombe's Secret Breakfast ice cream comes close.

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Ron Swanson's Turkey Burger

More proof that Ron Swanson is awesome:

"Have you ever had a turkey burger?"

"Is that a fried turkey leg inside a grilled hamburger? If so, yes. DELICIOUS."



Eater has made this meat-tastic fever dream a reality.

But watch out for the bone.

Pyramid of Greatness

Last night's "Parks & Recreation" featured Ron Swanson's "Pyramid of Greatness." It is awesome.

I'm somewhat perturbed by the fact that I actually agree with a large number of the boxes in the pyramid. (Especially this one: "TORSO: Should be thick and impenetrable." And the skim milk one, too.)

Chris Pratt Gets Fat

It ain't all about weight loss, people.

Sometimes, you just need to get fat. Especially if you're Chris Pratt, who plays chubby slacker Andy Dwyer on "Parks & Recreation," and your job depends on getting and staying doughy after a summer of (gasp!) physical fitness.

In this slideshow, he lets us in on his weight gain tips.

My favorite of the bunch: "'If you see something, eat something.' This is key -- I cannot stress enough how important it is to eat many things."