Monday's Workout: My Butt Hurts

The alarm jolted me awake at 4:20 a.m. Sadly, I'm still on Hawaii time, and my brain desperately tried to convince me it was 1:20 in the morning. I knew better. CrossFit Palo Alto beckoned, and after a week away, I couldn't stomach the thought of missing class. I tumbled out of bed and did my best to shake off the sleep.

Strength Skill:

• Cleans (2 sets of 5, 3 sets of 3)

"If you've done hang cleans before, practice power cleans from the floor this time," Tim instructed the 5 a.m. crew. "And if you already feel comfortable with those, start working on squat cleans." That meant me.



Although I've done squat cleans (where you catch the bar in rack position while down in a full squat) in metcons before, I'd never practiced them as a part of a strength workout, and was eager to give 'em a shot. Full cleans looked fun! I laced up my lifting shoes and got to work.

I started a little lighter than usual so I could focus on my form, and the first few sets felt great. My squats were deep and stable, and even the hook grip didn't feel as awkward as it normally does. I started adding weight.

"Don't look down, and don't look up. Keep your eyes straight ahead," Tim intoned from across the room. Sure, I thought. I got this.

Only I didn't.

On my second-to-last set, I let my mind drift, and began the first pull with my eyes staring down at the ground. A moment later, I found myself on my butt, with the weight of the barbell shoving my upper body to the floor. Luckily, I'm not particularly boobtastic; once the plates hit the mats, there was still some clearance between my chest and the bar, and I was able to just roll it away. It's been a while since I ass-planted during a lift, but this one was among the more spectacular.

"How many fingers was I holding up?" Tim demanded. Flat on my back, I shrugged.

"You don't know 'cause you were looking at the floor." (Later, he told me he hadn't been holding up any fingers at all.)

My next attempt was successful. I'd kept my gaze forward.

"What was different that time?" Tim asked.

"I didn't fall over?"

Metcon:

Three rounds for time:

• 20 box jumps (20")
• 15 barbell thrusters (95lbs / 65lbs)
• 10 burpees

It looked simple enough. Forty-five thrusters, just like with Fran. And 60 box jumps and 30 burpees? Not a problem, right?

But after practicing squat cleans, my legs were more than a little toasty. The first round went fine, but I got progressively slower with each round. The thrusters seemed heavier than normal -- which is weird, considering that we just finished working on heavy thrusters a couple of weeks ago. I'd like to chalk it up to jet lag, but I know better: I just need to get stronger.

Result: 12:48 as RXed. I took WAY too many breaks during the thrusters and burpees. I couldn't believe it took me almost twice as long as my Fran time to finish.

Tim walked over to where I'd slumped over. "What'd you think?"

"I think I regret practicing squat cleans before this WOD," I wheezed.